Alphabetical List of Chapters

                              Click on chapter number to be transported immediately to that essay

A Covid Outbreak at The Refuge Includes Pat and Then Ron Ch.135

A Death in the Family  Ch.140

A Feeling of Helplessness     Ch.65

A Fisherman Named Grief Reels Me In. Ch.154

A Good Day to Remember Ch.131

A Good Sign: I Realize I Am Not Alone in Grieving Ch.156

A Lesson in Humility: Ron the Caregiver Needs Care  Ch.132

A Rainbow Appears Just When I Need It  Ch.164

A Sad Day At the Refuge   Ch. 122

A Simple Gesture of Respect Ch.110

A Sudden Setback and a Big decision for Ron  Ch.127

Acceptance: Yes; Passivity: No   Ch.20

Adding Structure Challenges Lack of Initiative Caused by Lewy Body. Ch.23

Am I a Helicopter Husband?     Ch.2

An Emotional Roller Coaster Day  Ch.72

Are we Still On the Same Team?   Ch.85

Beautiful Service, Somber Burial, Unending Grief  Ch.150

Being Lost is Not a Great Experience Ch.78

Blackcap Pie, Memory Loss and Confusion.     Ch.28

Caregiver Meltdown   Ch.26

Care Partner Goals: Safety, Pleasure, Joy. Ch.58

Chasing After My Horse and Wondering About My Future  Ch.161

Creative Dining the Lewy Body Way.  Ch.133

Depression and Lewy Body.       Ch.16

Disheartening Morning; Somber Afternoon; Beautiful Evening.  Ch. 100

Empathy for a Couple Dealing with Dementia. Ch.163

Ending our Book on a Positive Note.. and Starting Another.  Ch.52

Every Caregiver Needs an Overload Specialist.   Ch.80

Exhaustion and Relief   Ch. 64

First Pat and Then Ron Join a Memory Choir    Ch.15

Frustration. Ch.83

Getting Stuck in the Courtyard Brings Back a Sad Memory Ch.145

Good Day/Bad Day: The Lewy Body Roller Coaster is Still Operating.  Ch.139

Good Days.   Ch.4

Good News: Pat Lodges One Complaint and Makes Two Requests.  Ch.119

Good Signs That I am Returning to Life  Ch.160

Hallucinations from Outside and Inside    Ch.1

Happy Memories Don't Have to Make Me Sad  Ch.157

Heartache Ch.151

Here's What We've been Avoiding Telling You   Ch.105

Hoping for a Miracle   Ch.74

Hospice. Ch.117

How Can We Keep Pat involved in the Conversation?  Ch. 70

I Love You, Sometimes. Ch.141

I Think I Did OK but Not Better Than OK Ch.68

I Visit Pat's Grave on Her Birthday. Ch.158

I Wasn't Talking in  My Sleep. I Was Talking in Your Sleep Ch.35

I Watch a Couple Holding hands -- and I Remember  Ch.155

I Wonder What I've Missed  Ch.134

If You Don't Laugh, You'll Cry.   Ch. 24

I'm Grateful We Can Still Disagree  Ch.69

I'm Here at The Refuge, Aren't I, to Stay Ch.108

I'm Ready to be Gone Ch.123

I'm Scared to Travel Away from Pat   Ch.19

It's a Good Thing we are Both Introverts  Ch.54

Keep On Trucking but I Won't Regret a Thing Ch.25

Keeping "Victories" and "Defeats" in Perspective  Ch.126

Lewy Body Affects Pat's Sense of Time. Ch.46

Lewy Body Helps Pat Find a  Way to Honor her Deceased Brother.  Ch.86

Looking Ahead to an Uncertain Future  Ch.172

Looking into the Void: Pat's Blank Stare Scares Ron Ch.142

Many Small Frustrations  Ch.51

McKenzie Maria McGillicutty: How to Have a Little Fun When it is Hard Finishing Your Sentences. Ch.104

Mornings Can Be Unpredictable in our Lewy Body World.   Ch.43

Mortality.  Ch.13

Need for Support, The  Ch.5

Noise   Ch.3

Not Driving --  A Blow to Pat's Spirit   Ch.18

Now What Will Give Meaning to My Life?  Ch.153

Our Children Want Us to Move into the City  Ch.47

Our Two Truths are like Oil and Water  Ch.48

Pat and I Go Shopping Together for the First Time in Over a Year  Ch.84

Pat and I have a Serious Conversation about Death and Loneliness  Ch.111

Pat and I Watch a Movie whose Main Character has Dementia   Ch. 75

Pat and Ron Confront the Corona Virus Ch.21

Pat Asks Ron How He has been Affected by Her Lewy Body. Ch.40

Pat Begins Taking a Strong Pain Reliever. Ch.109

Pat Calls Me "Dad" and that Feels OK.   Ch.53

Pat Cannot Say Ron's Name  Ch.118

Pat Develops a Serious Auto-Immune Disorder   Ch.62

Pat Eats Little but seems Unconcerned Ch.91

Pat Forgets but then She Remembers  Ch.71

Pat has a Second Syncope Episode --but Doesn't Remember It.   Ch.61

Pat Has Almost Two Pain Free Hours and Ron Begins to Relax Ch.114

Pat is Taken Off  Opioid Pain Medication and Immediately Functions Better  Ch.120

Pat has Gumption   Ch.63

Pat is Home with Me in my Heart. Ch.103

Pat is Transferred to a Rehab Facility  Ch. 98

Pat Joins a Memory Choir. Ch.36

Pat Keeps Losing Weight Even Though She Eats well Ch.144

Pat Moves to a Very Good Memory Care Center Ch.107

Pat No Longer Has the Ability to Help Write This Dialogue Ch.143

Pat Outwits a Would-Be Seducer  Ch. 88

Pat Potter-Efron Obituary  Ch.148

Pat Quietly Passes Away.  Ch.147

Pat Rallies and Says Something Beautiful   Ch.125

Pat Reads Nancy Drew to Ron  Ch.102.

Pat Realizes She's been Hallucinating Ch.34 

Pat Returns to the Hospital Ch. 97

Pat Still Gets to Choose  Ch.116

Pat Tells Me How Each Rock is Special  Ch.113

Pat Tells Me How She is Growing  Ch.96

Pat Tells Us She is in Charge Ch. 81

Pat Tells us about a Major Decision She Made.    Ch. 60

Pat Thinks Better than She Can Speak. Ch.112

Pat's Protectors Work Together to Help her Heal  Ch.130

Pat was Diagnosed with Lewy Body Exactly Four years ago Today Ch.137

Pat's Younger Brother Kevin Just Died  Ch.79

Physical Intimacy -- Hugs and More   Ch.9

Porch Bird Watching on the First Beautiful Spring Day of the Year   Ch.27

Questions for the New Year: 2019 and then 2020  Ch.10

Ron and Don Discuss their Roles with their Wives Ch.90

Ron Becomes Anxious and Irritable   Ch.59

Ron Begins to Recover His Sense of Humor  Ch.162

Ron Feels a Premonition  Ch.146

Ron Goes  to a Quilting Show with a Friend  Ch.159

Ron Has a Panic Attack and Pat has a Urinary Tract Infection Ch.92

Ron Makes a Serious Mistake and then So Does Pat   Ch.37

Ron Refuses to Give Up Hope  Ch.138

Ron Reminds Pat of her Accomplishments Ch.89

Ron, You Used to be Funnier  Ch.129

Ron's Covid Fatigue Helps Him Understand How Lewy Body Affects Pat  Ch.136

Short- and Long-Term Memory issues Ch.56

"Showtime"   Ch.8

Slightly Unusual Behaviors   Ch.17

Slow Motion Panic Attack   Ch.49

Some Days You Just Want to Cry  Ch.6

Some Mornings are Full of People  Ch.30

Something Bad had happened to Lakota. And Pat has a Fall  Ch. 66

Spring Colors and the Lewy Body Lifestyle   Ch. 87

Sudden Mood Changes   Ch. 22

Taste and Touch Connect Us  Ch.121

Tears of Love   Ch.106

The Apocalypse Arrived and Yet it was Not Apocalyptic  Ch. 39

The Body Keeps the Score Ch.77

The Gobbler and the Slowpoke: How Lewy Body Affects our Mealtimes.   Ch.76

The Story of Blackberry the Steer: How Pat Saved a Life and Gained a Large Friend   Ch 101

The Transition to the Assisted Living Center was Going Well --Until the Fire Alarm Went Off.  Ch.95

Time is Running Out  Ch.124

This is MY House   Ch.67

Today's Surprise: Ron Gets a Heart Stent.   Ch.32

Transitions.Ch.152

Twenty-Four Hours of Chaos  Ch.94

Two Exhausting Days    Ch.44

Two Rons     Ch.45

Unprepared for Life After Lewy Body: Ron's Fear of Boredom.  Ch.149

Waking Dreams, RBD, and Sleep Deprivation   Ch.14

We are Still a Team   Ch.12

We're Ready to Accept Help Ch.93

What Comes Next?  The Lewy Body Sequencing Problem   Ch.11

What Was Supposed to Bring Pride Brings Shame Instead Ch. 38.

Who Would take Care of Pat If I Couldn't?       Ch.42

Who Should I Tell I have Lewy Body? Acceptance, Embarrassment, Shame and Trust    Ch.7

Why Is It so Hard for Pat to Make Choices?  Ch.82

Why Now? Pat has a Flare Up of her Auto-Immune Disease       Ch. 99

Working Together  Ch.55

Year End Review: A Lewy Body Year of Transition Ch.115

























Coming Soon!