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Ch.125 Pat Rallies and Says Something Beautiful

Ch.125 Pat Rallies and Says Something Beautiful

March 2022

          Three days ago, Pat was barely conscious, heavily sedated with morphine but unable to communicate even when less sedated. I expected her to die soon.

          Two days ago, her pain subsided, and she quit taking morphine, instead being put on a less powerful opioid patch. She could only drink a little water.

          Yesterday, Pat was able to be fed some applesauce and a little pureed food. She could speak in partial sentences.

          Today, I asked Pat if she was hungry. “Yes, very hungry,” she said. I brought out a small cup of chocolate pudding which she ate without help and then she quickly consumed a whole plateful of chicken, peas, and pears (all pureed separately).

          Pat smiled. She said she was happy. Her eyes sparkled. She spoke in complete sentences, something that has become increasingly rare. We began discussing these last few years together – the Lewy Body years – and then she said: “Being in love is what the last few years has been about.”

           It’s been almost four years since Pat was diagnosed with Lewy Body. Because of Covid, we’d been mostly isolated the last two years until Pat went to the assisted living center. It’s been Pat and Ron, together, almost all the time. I suppose we could have ended up wanting to kill each other. But, instead, we are better connected and deeper in love than ever before. I’m sure that’s what Pat meant when she made that statement.

          I wish I knew what Pat will be like in the next few days. Will this rally continue, or will she slide back toward dying? Or will we go back and forth between these two states, as people with Lewy Body are well-known to do? I feel emotionally exhausted right now, teetering between hope and dread.

Pat’s comments on Pat Rallies and Says Something Beautiful:

          As noted above, it is now rare for Pat to speak in full sentences. But today, one week after I wrote the above note, when one of my daughters was saying good-bye and offering to kiss her, Pat paused, smiled, and asked “What would it take to get a hug and a kiss?”